fossilised | For Steve

Don't be silly.

[Steve's grin turns a bit mischievous as he looks over at Bucky.]

It's the post-it habit. The paperclips are just a bonus.

[He can't really look at Bucky too long or directly when he's grinning like that. It makes Steve's stomach do a sort of twisting thing it hasn't really done since high school. Especially since back then none of the guys that made his stomach do that would even give him a passing glance and here he is in his own kitchen making coffee and conversing with the one doing it now.

Oh little Steve, you'd be so proud of how far you've come.

He makes the coffee with practiced, easy movements as he talks, fetching a half-empty little jar of sugar while it brews. Huh, looks like he actually will need sugar soon, but it'll be enough for two cups even if Bucky's looking for a 1:1 ratio of coffee to sugar.]

It's closer to my work and to where I volunteer, so I can walk instead of taking the bus. My bus route before was not fun. Not bad really but long enough that it cut into my time a lot, I want to work more on my art. Also the apartment wasn't a whole lot better.

[Also with Steve moving out Natasha and her boyfriend are gonna have to commit to moving in together and he loves them but they are both dragging their feet so badly on this it is k i l l i n g him. Not that he would ever admit that anywhere where she could hear.]

[This guy really was a boy scout, wasn't he? Only someone with a lot of patience would volunteer with a bunch of broken people who were only in art therapy because their doctors or shrinks had forced it on them. He had a gorgeous smile and a body to die for, but it was the genuinely nice personality - or so it seemed - that made Bucky swallow just a little too hard sometimes.

Not that he would ask him out. A guy like this had to be taken, and probably wasn't even gay. And even if he was, and happened to be single, there's nobody on Earth who'd want James Barnes now. Not with all his issues and his stupid scarred up body.]

Where do you work?

[He figures that's not too personal a question. Maybe Steve is some big-shot artist with actual gallery time.]

I know the streets around here pretty well, maybe I could help you find a better route. I mean, if you needed one.

[He pulls the little sugar jar towards him and tips no less than eight teaspoons of the stuff into his coffee. He likes it black and so sweet that he can feel the cavities forming.]

[Steve's face does that beaming smile again at Bucky's offer. He was hoping, when he asked about Bucky's familiarity with the neighborhood earlier, but he didn't want to impose of Bucky wasn't comfortable.]

That'd be incredible. I mean - my walking route now that I'm looking at isn't bad but I'm sure it's probably not the most efficient. I can get turned around easy when I'm new to a place.

[As for where he works...]

I work at the government building a few blocks from where I volunteer for the art classes. The glamorous job of being employed as a glorified file clerk by the city. It pays the bills, though, and unlike being a starving artist it gives me health insurance.

[While he doesn't look it, he does have a host of conditions that he's got to deal with. As long as he keeps in shape and keeps up medication all he's really got to worry about is the occasional asthma attack - but it does mean he does need consistent insurance. As much as he'd love to be a full time artist, he does not in fact make enough money off of it to offset the cost. Such is life.

Someday. He's still young. Steve's nothing if not an optimist.]

[For the first time, Bucky feels a slight tendril of tension snake up his spine. Steve works for a government agency? It's a stupid reaction, he just said that he's a glorified file clerk and plenty of people work for the government, it's just a knee-jerk reaction. Like Steve isn't as safe as the image he projects.

It probably shows in the way that his hand tightens around his coffee mug, even if he keeps the smile at his lips.]

You don't really look like a file clerk. All the clerks I've ever met have been assholes who pretty much chew bitterness for breakfast and then spit it out at everyone all day.

[Just probing for more information there.]

[It does show, and again Steve doesn't pretend to not notice. He reacts little aside from his voice significantly gentleing as he adds sugar to his own cup which is branded by a local art gallery logo. He usually prefers a little cream and a little sugar, but lacking in cream he adds more sugar to make up the difference.]

However awful it is to deal with them, I promise, it's just as soul killing behind the desk more often than not. I, thankfully, work for Parks and Recreation in particular. Mostly moving paperwork from point A to point B and directing people who to talk to for the best results. My boss did have me paint a small mural for a park last month when the original plans fell through and liked it so much she's looking to have me do more, so I'm hopeful. I'm really just working there until I can make it enough from art alone.

[He gestures with his coffee mug out to his desk with the work in progress pieces on it. One is a cityscape partially painted to show the colors at sunset, brighter and more vibrant than they ever really get in life. The other started out as a figure study when Nat was doing ballet practice that got a little out of hand and turned out unexpectedly well. It's still in pencils.]

I'm hoping to get those two to a gallery I've had luck with in the past. Knock on wood for me.

You actually work for Parks and Rec?

[Bucky couldn't help the tiny twitch of his lips, though he managed not to outright laugh. He thought that department was made up for the TV show, he never imagined that it was actually a real government office. And knowing he worked there did a lot to ease his tension, there's nothing threatening about someone who helps maintain parkland areas.]

That's--

[He cuts off as Steve gestures to the paintings, finally drawing his attention to them and arresting his attention pretty efficiently. Wow. Those were amazing, he knew Steve must be able to draw because all art teachers had to be at least a bit proficient, but these are stunning.]

--shit, Rogers. Those are amazing, you really did those? Now I'm even more embarrassed of my boat.

It's actually pretty boring in real life, promise.

[Though of course he had to watch the show too. If nothing else he got made fun of at work until he did.

His smile turns downright bashful when Bucky compliments his work, though. He's generally not self conscious about it anymore, but this is a very physically and emotionally attractive person in his apartment doing the complementing, ok.]

I maintain that your boat was perfectly fine. Even if it wasn't seaworthy. I've been drawing since forever, after all. I've got more stuff but it's still wrapped … uh, I can show you if you're interested, though?

Yeah.

[Bucky smiles, a proper smile in his enthusiasm. He's not an artist himself, but that doesn't mean that he can't appreciate good art when he sees it, and he'd like to spend his afternoon looking at something beautiful. It beats sitting on the floor of his apartment trying to get up the nerve to go to the supermarket.

He reaches out and takes the sugar pot again and adds another eight teaspoons to his coffee as if he hadn't already done it.]

I'd love to see them. If, uh, if you're not too busy unpacking. Or if you don't gotta be in work. It's cool if you do, you've already filled the quota on polite neighbour with the cup of coffee.

[Which he will not enjoy when he takes another sip. He forgot he added the sugar already, damn it. He's getting a lot better, his memory has improved so much since those initial months in the hospital, but he still sometimes has trouble with remembering little mundane things. His apartment is coated in post-its with appointment times and if he's eaten or not that day. Once he showered four times in one day because he kept forgetting he'd done it, he's a lot improved from that now.]

Took the day off for the move, so I've got nowhere else to be if you haven't been bored to tears yet. Want another cup of coffee before I talk your ear off first?

[At first he thought James just had an incredible sweet tooth, until that last grimace. Well, he clearly does anyway, and Steve is maybe making a mental note to make sure he's always got a lot of sugar on hand in case Bucky drops by for coffee again.

Nothing is wrong with wanting to make your friends happy, okay. And he'd like to believe that him and James could be friends.

(Well ok he’d really like to be significantly more than friends, but that's still firmly parked in the territory of “Don't even kid yourself, Rogers”.)]

[Bucky flushes when he realises that he's been caught out in his coffee blunder, more embarrassed than he probably should be. It's stupid, Steve doesn't know anything about his past, he probably just assumes he did a dumb thing like people always do every day, not that he has memory issues.

Still, it makes him feel awkward even as he nods.]

I said I want to see your art, Rogers.

[It's easier to pretend there's nothing under the surface making him uncomfortable. He likes this guy, he's probably the first person that Bucky's spent time with since being back that he's actually smiled around, and they're going to be neighbours so sue him for wanting to make a good impression.]

You going to keep me waiting all day, build the suspense, or are you going to get with the art?

[Bucky even looks attractive when he goes red.

Shit, Steve hasn't had it this bad in a while. He takes a sip of his own coffee and averts his eyes in an attempt to hide his own blush in response before he sets the mug aside in favor of holding up his hands in a sign of surrender.]

You're the boss. Right this way, the light is better out here anyway.

[Steve takes two of the boxes from the small pile, setting them in the middle of the floor. Sketchpads and smaller canvases, as well as a couple framed pieces that he really was proud of and either didn't want to or couldn't sell. He likes drawing scenery and people most of all, it seems. His sketchpads also contain a few humorous cartoony doodles in the corners of blank space that were bothering him.

His friends group carried over from college are his most common subjects as far as people go, being the most easily accessible ‘models’ available. Natasha more than any of the others as they roomed together after college and her ballet, yoga, aerobics, and martial arts practices made her a very good subject to practice movement and the human figure on.

He's going to need a new main model what with not living with her anymore. Maybe he could convince James…

(Near the back of the most recent sketchpad he kind of actually already drew Bucky once from memory a few days ago. Which of course he's already forgotten about. Uh, oops.)]

[Bucky likes Steve a little bit more for not asking about the coffee or making a deal about it, he likes him for not asking why he always keeps his left hand in his pocket or wears long sleeves when it's such nice weather, because he's compassionate but not pitying and that's a rare thing to find. Jesus, he's starting to really like him, and he's only met the guy twice, this could be dangerous as hell.

He pads after him on silent bare feet, as if moving as quietly as possible is now second nature to him, over to where all the sketchpads and canvases are kept. He looks through the framed and bigger painted pieces first, giving each one time and proper consideration, before he moves onto the sketchpad. He doesn't speak, but the silence isn't a judgemental or awkward one, it's just because he's so absorbed in what he's looking at.

These are gorgeous.

Even the basic pencil drawings of people in his sketchpad. These ones that keep cropping up, of people he doesn't know. A man with a bow and arrow shooting in some kind of tournament, that same guy flopped on a sofa eating pizza, playing a video game, messing around with others. The ballerina in athletic poses, in martial arts gear, smiling in sweatpants. They're such simple lines, but they're full of life and vitality, almost like he knows the people just from the pictures.

And then he turns the last page and-- oh. That's him. Sat in profile with the hint of a six o'clock shadow, long hair escaping from the bun at the back of his head as he worked on the drawing of a boat. He looks intense, he looks handsome. His eyes flick up to Steve, something equally as intense in his eyes now.]

You drew me?

[It's neutral, not approving or disapproving. But he hasn't noticed any pictures of the rest of the class in this book.]

[Bucky’s neutral tone has Steve expecting the worst - his blush from before returns and deepens as he suddenly has to look anywhere else.]

Well - you have excellent bone structure.

[It's not a lie, but with how quickly he blurts it out it definitely sounds like the first excuse he could think of. Quick, Rogers, think of something better! Back to banter, banter works!]

-- and well if you didn't come back to class I was considering putting up missing person signs so I needed something.

[Well, it sure is Steve’s turn to take the borderline pleading tone in hopes that Bucky goes for the joke instead. He doesn't want to make things weird, not when they're still so early on in knowing each other.]

[He certainly doesn't think that Steve finds him attractive, there's not much about him to be attractive now and Steve-- God, look at him. The man might be the most gorgeous thing in the world, he has to be taken. Maybe by the ballerina he's clearly drawn with such affection in the book.

Bucky really doesn't know why he's been drawn, maybe it was as simple as good bone structure in his face, but the desperate joke does at least make him twitch his lips up.]

I don't think anyone's ever drawn me before.

[At least he doesn't sound mad.]

It wouldn't work as a wanted poster, you've used too much artistic license. Hell, if I looked that good, I'd be a goddamn model and living in a penthouse somewhere. But it's good, really good. Should I be flattered or creeped out?

[Steve doesn't think Bucky is taken - only because Steve can't imagine having someone like Bucky as a significant other and not wanting to be glued at the hip and making sure he was okay. Probably Bucky wants to be alone.

For fuck's sake, Rogers, statistically, Bucky is probably straight. And even if he was gayer than a two dollar bill he'd still be miles out of Steve's league.

He's relieved when Bucky doesn't sound mad, at least. Still certain he's been found out but Bucky is doing the kind thing and pretending to not notice, Steve is grateful, even.]

I did mot use any artistic license here, okay. Maybe you don't have any mirrors in your apartment, but I promise that is what you look like.

[Was Rogers hitting on him?

No. No way, he couldn't be. The man had to be straight, all those pictures of the ballerina were so filled with love that it was impossible to imagine they might not be a couple, he was probably just trying to be kind.]

I guess I better go and call Calvin Klein tomorrow and start my new career then, huh?

[He snorts and finally closes the sketchbook, concealing the picture of himself.]

It's Bucky, by the way, not James. [If they're going to be neighbours and hopefully spending a little time together, then he doesn't want to be James. Only his Ma and SO used James.] James Buchanan Barnes, Bucky comes from Buchanan. Don't laugh, I know it's dumb, being named after the most forgotten president.

Well, he was followed by Lincoln who was pretty damn memorable, so it's not really his fault he got overshadowed. Probably for the better, since most historians blame him for the civil war since he didn't take any hard stances on abolition versus slavery.

[Because, of fucking course, Steve totally knows about President James Buchanan and has an opinion on him.]

Bucky it is, though. I just go by Steve. Well, Natasha and Tony have a laundry list of nicknames but I'd rather most of them not get repeated. And my middle name is 'Grant', thankfully my mom didn't go for Ulysses as a first name. Lord knows I didn't need any help being unpopular growing up.

[Of course Steve had an opinion and knowledge on even the past presidents, how was this guy even real? His first instinct when Steve mentions not being popular is to laugh, he can't imagine this guy being anything except popular, but he doesn't because he doesn't know.

People change all the time, and he doesn't know what's happened in this guy's past. But he can't imagine his personality has changed a whole lot.]

Kids are dumb, proof in point.

[Anyone who wouldn't be friends with Steve is an actual moron.]

Unless your name really is Ulysses and you're just trying to cover by telling me it's Steve. It's okay, you can tell me, I'll only laugh a bit.

[Steve laughs and shakes his head a bit bashfully, falling back into the comfortable spot again now that they've moved away from his (in his mind) very obvious attraction to Bucky.]

It's actually Steve, I promise. I'd trust you with the truth if it was Ulysses though. I don't exactly have a lot of secrets.

[There's no way Bucky believes that. A guy like this, looking this good and so apparently perfect, has to have a few secrets. Nobody is this likeable, this talented, and this hot. Nobody. He has to have some skeletons in the closet, but he doesn't probe for them right now. That's not his business, he's met the guy all of twice.]

Sure thing, Ulysses.

[He throws Steve a grin and sets his coffee mug down, getting up to put it on the kitchen counter.]

So-- uh, why don't you hit me up when you want to work on a route to get to work? I should let you go grocery shopping or you won't have any food for when you're done unpacking.

Yeah, of course.

[He should do that, and let Bucky go about his day and not horde all his time. Clinginess is one of Steve's worse traits and he knows how off-putting it is. Besides, any crisis that came up was averted, they're ending on a good note, better to end it here.]

Would the day after tomorrow be too soon? If you aren't busy with other plans.

[Other plans. Sure.

He's supposed to have appointments at the VA most days, and some physical therapy at the hospital, but he's been blowing all those off since the art class, he can keep blowing them off for a few more days. Or forever, whatever.]

Don't you have to be back in work tomorrow?

[Didn't he just take the one day off for a move?]

I kind of thought-- maybe later tonight, after you're done unpacking.

[Is that too keen? Maybe it's too keen, Steve probably has his other friends - hell, even his girlfriend - coming by to help straighten things out.]

But the day after tomorrow is fine, sure. I can work with that.

Ah, no, I mean - I do have work tomorrow, I figured I'd just give myself extra time to get lost and not really figure out the best way. I didn't want to like - I mean. You have a life of your own and all -

[Oh god Steve you're babbling shut it shut it right now]

If you're still free later tonight that'd be great. I just didn't want to assume, you know? I'll get you dinner as a thank you.

[Bucky felt himself grin, it was almost adorable that Steve was babbling as if he cared what his stupid bare-foot grungy neighbour thought about him. Accepting dinner might be a bit dicey; he knew it was just a polite thank you, he wasn't dumb enough to think it was a date, but it could mean one of two things.

A take out would be great, but dinner out somewhere would probably be a disaster. Still, he didn't want to fuck this fledgling friendship up, so he nodded.]

Sure. Let me go and change, find some boots, and you can come up when you're done unpacking. 4C, right above you.

I won't take too long and keep you up waiting, promise.

[This is going great! He is thinking take-out as well, if only because of how anxious class made Bucky when it was set up to be a relaxing setting as much as possible. Also there's something traditional about breaking in a new apartment with take-out.]

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Aaaand phone tag bc I couldn't wait to get home and get to laptop.

woop woop! And I happen to be around because GMT and day off

Woo!

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