fossilised | It's AU time

"Yeah, you've always been such a sucker for..." Becca actually trailed off. It was the first time that Steve had actually seen someone talk like that, exhaling at the tail end. Her eyes shifted towards Steve and their hands before she smirked. "You're like half the size of the guys Jimmy used to bring home," she said bluntly. Steve could appreciate that.

"Guess that makes me the one that breaks the mold," he said in his good natured way, squeezing Bucky's hand. "But you're more than welcome to stay the night. I don't want you to drive all the way back tonight. I'll get you some blankets and a pillow-- I don't think we have any left overs from dinner, but Bucky's a great cook--"

"Yeah if you like rat poison," the girl said, but she looked so much more relaxed now. Her smile was just as perfectly appealing as her brother's. They shared the same blue eyes too.

"Hm. I've got fatter tots and chicken nuggets-- Yes I realize that makes me look like I'm five but they're the best comfort food available and I think we can all use some comfort food right about now."

"Fuck yeah we can," Becca said, stretching out. "And alcohol...?"

It was so weird to see Steve and Becca interact as if they had known each other ages. But then, Becca had always shared his ability to just make friends at the drop of a hat, they had both been outgoing kids with a huge circle of friends. He might not be that any more, but it was good to see that Becca still was.

"Yeah, and alcohol."

If he had to spend an evening with his sister, then he needed something to get him through it. Even if drunk Bucky was a bad idea at the best of times, let alone in such a volatile situation.

"I've got some upstairs, I'll, uh, I'll go and get it."

He retreated again for the door, aware of two sets of eyes on him, and made his escape. Rebecca sighed when the door was closed, looking up at Steve as he bustled around getting tater tots and chicken nuggets.

"Sorry I yelled at you, I didn't know he even had a boyfriend. Steve, right? Is he-- is he okay?"

"He's coping," Steve said honestly. "And after what he's been through, that's pretty good. The whole dating thing only just started though so it's all right. My best friend only found out about it too." He was easy to talk to, which was why Bucky latched on so quickly. Becca was going to be the same, and she hopped right on over to the kitchen to watch him arrange the frozen food on a sheet pan. "I just-- could I ask a favor? Can this just be a visit? Maybe not ask too much about how he is or what he went through...?"

His smile was bare, but earnest. He wanted to keep this light and pleasant and that meant that Rebecca had to play along here.

She looked a little skeptical. Steve didn't really blame her, but eventually she did agree and they waited together for Bucky to come back.

Agree she might do, but she would wait until Bucky wasn't around for a longer period of time before interrogating Steve. He seemed to know more about what was going on and what had gone on than her, and she wanted to make sure that he was good for her stupid big brother. But not yet. She would be as casual as she could be.

Bucky reappeared after a few more minutes with a different shirt on (a clean one), and a duffel bag in his hand. He put it down on the counter and extracted one bottle of vodka, a six pack of beer, and a small bottle of rum. Also in the bag were some sweat pants and t-shirts, which he took into Steve's room with a slightly challenging look as if to say 'you asked me to move in, now some of my clothes are here'.

"Okay, so--" He cleared his throat, before going for a lighter hearted attempt. "You better not have been telling Steve horrible stories about me."

"Who me?" Becca asked, also trying her best because of what she'd agreed to. "You mean like the time you cried because Mom sold your barbie in a yard sale?"

Steve's eyes lit up and he swiveled around to face Bucky with hands on his hips. "Not your Barbie!" he gasped, feigning dismay as if he could considerate. He didn't have a lot of toys growing up, Barbies or otherwise, but that wasn't ever an issue. Paper and something to write on it with were the only things he needed to occupy himself and his mind.

He made an effort to try not to laugh but that was proving to be impossible. He settled himself down on the edge of the sofa, hunkering in for the story, before the timer on the oven went off.

"You're so lucky-- Bec, I need that story later. We're going to exchange emails," Steve promised.

Bec and Buck. Evidently Steve just liked to shorten names like that.

"Now-- you're over twenty-one, right?" He didn't know the age difference between Bucky and his sister.

Rebecca gave him a slightly startled and intense sort of look, no doubt wondering why her very skittish brother's boyfriend was being so helpful. But she wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth, so she immediately grabbed a piece of paper and scribbled on the back with a pen from her purse: becca.barnes65@gmail.com.

"She's nineteen," said Bucky, even as he detached one of the beers and threw it over to her. He had never minded too much about drinking underage himself, though not under eighteen, and so he wasn't going to mind Becca doing it either. "She's nineteen and I'm twenty five."

He glanced over at her, something hungry in his eyes even if the question was casual.

"Did you end up going to college?"

Last time he had seen her, she had been in high school and applying to places without any real idea of what she'd take as her major. No, that wasn't exactly true. Last time he had seen her, she had been crying as he left for deployment.

"Uh... Yeah? Of course I went to college. Don't be an idiot," Becca said, immediately hostile again as if that was a sticking point between them and so Steve took over with a tater tot offering and a smile.

"In Boston? That's exciting. I've always wanted to go. I've never actually left New York, so that's pretty cool to me. What school?" He liberally dunked a chicken nugget in honey as he spoke and Becca followed him with the same as if it was a competition to get the most honey on a food object.

"U-Mass," she said, glancing at Bucky. "I'm studying social work and stuff like that." She wanted to help soldiers like her brother when they came back from war.

Steve nodded along, offering praise. "Regular college wasn't right for me. I started the Brooklyn Institute of Fine Art last year." It was easier for him to talk instead of Bucky, Steve figured that out a long time ago. He did his best to keep his questions light and focused on his sister. "Do you stay on campus?"

"I did my first year but I'm with a bunch of girls in an apartment off campus now." She also offered up information about her favorite class and about how hard the work was and that she was on the soft ball team too. And all without throwing punches!

Bucky was both touched and a little saddened to hear what Rebecca had chosen to study. She could have done anything and instead she chose a major that would let her help people like Bucky, who had stubbornly gone to war and come back changed people. He wondered if the people on her course knew about her personal connection, or if they were all like that, family members trying to do their bit.

After a while he settled down into a more comfortable silence. He didn't jump in like he used to, full of energy and confidence, but he smiled as he listened and edged closer so he could end up taking Steve's hand.

"Steve's amazing, you should see some of the stuff he's drawn. All the paintings in here were by him, don't let him tell you that he's not a genius."

Rebecca looked over in surprise when Bucky finally joined in, smile softening. "Yeah, I can see that. You really did all of these, Steve? That's wonderful."

"Thanks," he said, eyes warm as he scooted over just a little with his knees against Bucky's outer thigh. "I actually want to do comics-- I know. That's the new buzzword, right? I just want to tell stories but I'm not a writer."

Steve ended up stretching out with his feet crossed on the coffee table and a plate of tots and nuggets in his lap. He leaned against Bucky and lightly touched his thigh from time to time as he spoke about his characters until Becca groaned and threw up her hands.

"Okay, okay, you can totally marry my brother. You're awesome. I'm gonna swap you out for him!"

Steve immediately colored, flashing red. "You should give us a few months before we start wedding planning," he choked.

Bucky snorted, half at Rebecca's blunt assessment of Steve and half at Steve being red as a tomato. It was good that they were getting along, if he had to try and deal with his family back in his life, then he wanted them to like Steve. The man was very important to him now.

"He's a better deal than me, Becca," he said, trying to join in on the joke but finding it fell kind of flat when he actually believed that. "He's so all-American, you have no idea. His birthday is July 4th, he has a sweater with an eagle on it, and he bakes apple pies."

Sorry, Steve, time to sell him down the river for teasing to cover up his own issues.

Now it was Becca's turn to laugh. "You're kidding, right? Is that true, Steve, are you secretly the most patriotic person ever?"

"I mean I'm pretty patriotic," Steve said, nibbling the breeding off of the chicken around the edges. "I think any American is, even if we don't agree with what's going on politically. But I didn't buy that eagle sweater and I don't have the Starspangled Banner or America the Beautiful as a ringtone either. So I think that I am secretly an averagely patriotic American, thank you very much!"

Despite the whole initial chase and the rocky chatter, things were going pretty well now. Steve couldn't be more pleased even if all of this was at his expense.

And let it be! He found it all to be amusing.

"I do have a really killer apple pie recipe though," he admitted, making the siblings laugh uproariously. Steve tried to keep a straight face for as long as he could before he was laughing too.

This wasn't how he imagined Christmas to be, but it was a damned fine one anyway.

Bucky actually almost found himself enjoying the evening after a while. He wasn't sure why the usually forthright and determined Rebecca wasn't interrogating him with questions, having no idea that Steve had basically made her promise to have this time just be about relaxation, but it was good... it was nice.

But as time wore on towards night, he began to get tense again. He knew with the upsets and strain of the day that it wouldn't be a good night. He never managed to have a night without nightmares after a day with a lot of social stuff going on, and he didn't want to have one around either Steve or Becca. What if he hurt either one of them?

Eventually he got to his feet with an exaggerated stretch.

"I should be heading upstairs to bed, are you guys going to be okay down here together?"

"Don't you guys--"

Steve cut her off. "We only just started dating," he reminded her in order to keep her from asking questions. Bucky wanted to sleep alone and while Steve wanted more of him, he understood the reasons why and he respected them too. He wasn't going to make a scene for an excuse to snuggle. "Make yourself at home. I'll be right back."

"I could just stay with my older brother...? Or don't you have a couch?" Becca frowned skeptically.

"You don't want to be up there. It's a mess," Steve teased and watched Becca try to decide if she should hug her brother or not. Luckily, she opted for the not and Steve was able to get Bucky into the hall and the door shut for a little extra kissing before he left him go upstairs. "Text me if you need me. Or crawl into bed with me if you want later. You still have the extra key?"

Bucky couldn't help but look a little shame faced, as if Becca knew he was only trying to run away, but he didn't back down and was grateful when Steve came to his rescue to make excuses and usher him out. He wound his arm around his boyfriend's slender hips and pulled him in close for a tender kiss.

"Yeah, you sure you don't mind me having that?"

He wasn't going to come down tonight. He'd miss Steve, which was stupid considering how new their whole relationship was, but he had a lot more nights in the future to end up tangled together with him. He could go one without in the interest of safety.

"Don't let Becca bully you, okay? Text me when you're up in the morning and I'll come down."

He'd be awake, he probably wouldn't get a whole lot of sleep that night.

There was a lot of talking to be done that night but Steve did his best to respect Bucky's boundaries. It wasn't his place to tell his sister anything so he kept it to them-specific stories and he got to hear about what Buck was like as a kid and how Becca and her mother were coping. They ended up face timing her for a little while and Becca filled her in on her drive up and how nice Steve was and how good Bucky looked considering.

"I hope I can visit next time," their mother said and Steve humbly said that he hoped she could too, even for just a little awhile.

"Your son isn't great with talking. But he's opening up slowly and-- it's just going to be a slow process."

"He should marry you. You're such a good boy, Steve. A good young man. He's lucky to have you."

Steve went to bed with Bucky's family adoring him. It was such an odd place to be considering how fast this was going and how inexperienced he was as a whole.

He woke up to fifteen texts from Nat and two from Becca before he rolled over to text Bucky he was awake. He'd deal with his couch surfer and bestie later.

Bucky had no idea that Steve had suddenly become an adopted son of his family. If he had known then he would have been a little amused, a little proud, and most weirded out. Partially because they really had just started dating and that seemed like a lot of pressure very fast, but mostly because his family had never been ones to attach themselves like that to any of his past boyfriends. Maybe it was because Steve was being so accommodating in helping them get connected to Bucky again, or maybe it was just that Steve was the nicest guy he had ever gone out with.

As expected, he hadn't slept much. He had got an hour or so before he woke up with a choked scream at the back of his throat, just managing to swallow it down before he woke up the whole building. He spent much of the rest of the night prowling from room to room checking the place for bugs, just something to ease his mind. But at least he hadn't hurt anyone, that was what was important.

He had showered and dressed in fresh clothes well before the text came through, so it was only a minute or two later that he was letting himself in quietly in case Becca was still asleep on the couch, to seek out Steve.

Thankfully, Becca had given up on Steve a little while ago and had fallen back to sleep after raiding his fridge. That meant that Bucky was able to sneak in and climb into bed with his sleep-warmed boyfriend, who very happily snuggled up against him, arm tight around him.

He told Bucky everything, including the conversation with his mother but minus that second wish for marriage. "Bec said she'll be driving back this morning," he whispered softly. "I think your mother would like you to call once every few weeks if that's all right with you. She just wants to know how you're doing."

She wanted to visit too, but Steve just hoped that she wasn't too serious about that for the moment. Bucky was so much better with kid gloves.

"How'd you sleep?"

Bucky wasn't too happy about the idea that Steve had almost negotiated for him to keep in contact with his family, and it probably showed in the way he was tense against Steve's body. He ignored the question and instead just rested his nose atop a blond haired head, trying not to be mad with his boyfriend. Steve was a good guy, he was only trying to do what was best.

"I wish you wouldn't have let her stay," he said in the end. "Or talked to my Ma. I don't want to get involved, and now they've got their hopes up and they won't give up trying."

Maybe in a few months time when he had a job and a stable life (because he was still deluding himself that it would be that easy and he didn't need any therapy or help), then he would be able to handle them on his life.

"I just want you."

Steve was the good point in his life right now, Steve was calming and not stressful, was it so bad to just want to cling to that for a while?

"I didn't want your sister to drive all the way home in the dark for six hours Christmas night," Steve murmured. "I would have preferred she didn't stay either. I had a lot of plans," he said in an attempt to smooth things over. "It wasn't my choice to talk to your mom either but think about it this way. You won't have anyone just showing up anymore. They just want to hear your voice sometimes."

Hopefully Bucky would understand that. Steve didn't want to lose him over this and he knew he had probably overstepped here but Bucky put him in a hard place by rushing off upstairs.

He couldn't just ignore someone. It wasn't in his nature. As unfortunate as that probably was.

It also didn't help that he liked Becca. And that he thought that Bucky was better off with his family. He just wasn't going to say that out loud.

It was really hard to be annoyed at Steve when he was so logical and right and good, but Bucky still managed it a little bit. He didn't want Becca to drive back that far at night either, not when she'd already driven six hours that day, but he really didn't want to pressure of knowing he had to call every few weeks.

"Just maybe don't get too involved with them yet, okay?"

He had a feeling that even if Becca and his Mom obeyed the rule to not come around and to let him call, they'd probably still text Steve a lot and try to get to Bucky through him. To find out updates and generally be involved.

"Only for a while. I'm gonna get a job soon, get on my feet, and then it'll be okay."

"They're your family. I'm-- I'm sorry if it seems like-- I'm just sorry, Bucky. I'm trying to make the best out of a bad situation. I got you really involved in this whole mess to begin with because you called--"

He needed to keep his big mouth to himself.

There was some movement out in the other room and so Steve elected to be the one to keep Becca company until she was ready to leave. He could be persuasive about that if he tried. He might be a nice guy but he didn't let people walk all over him.

"You can stay here. She probably will understand if you don't say goodbye."

Steve was a good guy and he wanted to do the right thing, that was a really excellent character trait to have, but Bucky was just starting to see that it could be a detrimental one too. He didn't know when to back down, and if he saw a situation that he could try and make better, it seemed like he couldn't stop himself from wading in and giving it his all.

Then again, that was one of the reasons he had fallen for him.

"No, I need to talk to her. Maybe I can make her persuade Ma to give me some more time, just to get sorted."

He finally relaxed enough to press a kiss into Steve's hair.

"Don't beat yourself up, I know you just wanted to help."

It was hard to do right by Bucky because there were some parts of him that were just really fragile and the last thing Steve wanted to do was hurt him. He rolled them both over, in his loose white tank and looser blue pajama pants, and climbed on top of Bucky to give him a proper kiss before it occurred to him that he had a terrible morning breath situation going on here. He bounded out of bed the way that only someone of his stature could before he flopped towards the door and into the bathroom.

Becca would be up and dressed by the time that Steve returned, shoes on and hair in a messy bun. "Didn't want to just leave without a goodbye. Thanks. Seriously. Just knowing he's okay and has someone is going to go a long way with me and mom."

She gave Steve a hug, maybe too long and too tightly.

"Just take care of him will you?"

Steve didn't even have to promise. She knew he would.

Bucky emerged out of Steve's bedroom in his fresh clothes, looking slightly rumpled for having flopped into bed with Steve, and said goodbye to his sister. He asked her to please just give him a couple of months to get properly set up, he had some jobs in the works and needed to concentrate on maybe getting one of them, and then he'd see about calling.

She looked sad in the way that said she knew he was lying, but she didn't contradict him, she just told him to call any time and reminded him that she loved him, and then left for the long drive back home.

Bucky reached out for Steve almost as soon as she was gone, pulling him in close for a kiss that was half relief and half affection.

"When do you go back to work and school?" he asked, as if Becca hadn't even been there. It was his way of silently asking Steve to just let it all go for now, and let him work it out for himself. "Because I think I promised not to let you out of bed for a week, or something similar."

Steve was pretty sure that he wouldn't bring up the whole Becca and Mom thing ever again. Bucky Barnes would be in charge of curating all of that. Steve would just be filler conversation when and if it happened. So happy was he to switch topics after the door was shut and they heard the buzzer on the door downstairs. "You actually said that you'd make it so I couldn't sit for a week," he clarified. "I'm off until the first week of January from school. Still have work tonight but it's only for three hours. I have a client appointment."

He wished Bucky could come to work with him but he understood why that would be a bad idea.

"Oh. Hey. Speaking of jobs. How are you are tracing and keeping a steady hand?" All tattoo artists had to do was trace what was drawn. Well. No. There was more to it than that but it was a good basic. "Because Mickey teaches classes. You might get that gun hand a new sort of work."

He'd never once seen Bucky's hand tremble and he'd wondered several times now if he used to be a marksman.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject