fossilised | It's AU time

"I know how to be gentle, Tony," said Steve in as patient a voice as he could muster. He liked Tony, he did, and years of putting up with him and inured him to a certain extent. But the man was still trying to his patience, which was why he was always surprised that someone with anger issues like Bruce would be the one to be with him.

Steve took hold of Loki-- Loren-- whatever his name was carefully by the shoulders and pulled him into a sitting position, which stretched the stitching and the gauze plastered down his spine. Loren groaned quietly in his sleep, and the machines spiked as the pain from behind manhandled in a direction his body did not want to go pulsed through him, though the sedatives kept him firmly under.

"Okay, now peel back the gauze and start spreading the salve. You need to massage it in as deep as you can, and Loki said to use the whole pot."

He still didn't always trust the trickster, with good reason, but he tried to be quiet about it now that the man was royal consort to Asgard and a mother in his own right (which was just weird to him), or Thor might take his head clean off with Mjolnir.

If Steve knew how to be gentle, why was Loren in such pain? Tony was momentarily angry before he realized how little good that anger would do either of them right now. He knew that he was afraid and that this situation was stressful. That was not important right now. He needed to be calm. Like he was trying to diagnose a difficult motor or figure out why the electronics in a luxury car shorted out.

Pulling two gloves from the box on the wall, he cradled the jar I his arms ubtil Loren was protected from whatever he might have lurking under his nails. He sat on the bed in the warm spot left by Loren's body and unscrewed the cap on the jar. "This is honey," he said, as if the entire thing was ridiculous. "You want me to pour honey on-- All right, all right," he groaned. Sometimes he needed to take things on a little more faith.

Working the sticky fluid into the wound was horrifying. Steve kept telling him to go as deep as possible and that required actually sticking his fingers into the wound. He had to keep from vomiting. He'd been fine in the triage situation with Banner, but it had been dark and he hadn't had his fingers this close to Loki's actual spine.

"Okay... Oh fuck... Please Loren... I'm sorry if I do something wrong," he murmured the entire time, tipping more honey onto his fiancé.

It was so strange to see Tony so squeamish about something like this. The Tony he knew had removed his own arc reactor to replace it more than once, had treated bullet wounds and stab wounds and all sorts of other wounds, and had been present at no less than three births of weird Asgardian/Jotun babies. He had seen his fair share of gore, and yet this Tony looked about ready to throw up or pass out.

"You're doing great, Tony, just a little bit longer."

Poor guy. Steve really hoped this worked and that Loki hadn't sent him here with a dud, for Tony's sake more for the unconscious Loren. He couldn't imagine that a human Loki would be any more tolerable to be around.

As the last of the honey got massaged deep into the wound, Tony would feel it harder to pull his fingers out as the skin began to literally knit closed in front of his eyes. The smell of sweetness grew stronger as the healing continued.

"Woah! Okay, all right, you guys are the real deal huh? Are you a god too?" Tony's voice had a nervous edge to it, not because he thought he was in the presence of a god so much as because he was watching Loren heal right in front of him, like the honey had stimulated the cells to work at a thousand times their natural pace. Or to remove whatever damage had occurred to them immediately, since there didn't seem to be any scar tissue.

He helped Steve lay Loren back and he carefully folded down the gauze taped over the front of his wound... The same thing was happening, the puss was bubbling away and the angry redness of the stitched up wound was fading back to a pale, snowy white.

He couldn't stop himself from laughing as he took Loren's hand in his. He felt like crying. He felt like he might tip over and pass out. He kind of wanted to kiss Steve Rogers too.

"Jesus Christ-- thank you." Another almost first from a Stark. They didn't thank anyone.

"What, me? No! No, I'm just a guy from Brooklyn, a normal human like you. And I don't care what Loki told you, he's not a god either, they're just-- not from earth. A different species, but they're not gods."

Steve still believed in the one true God, he would never accept that the Asgardians were anything more than aliens who happened to have come across an older Norse civilisation and been accepted as gods.

"And you're welcome. Really. The rip is our problem, the least we can do is help out where we've ruined things. That'll still take a bit to work, though, he should be all done healing tomorrow or the day after."

He stepped back finally and scrubbed his hands on his jeans.

"So-- I don't actually have a way home until they come for us in a week."

"You're kidding me..." They had just carefully laid Loren back and covered him up and hooked up anything that might have come loose. Tony removed his gloves to shake Steve's hand and instead, he discovered a roommate instead. The man groaned. "Well that's just--" The sarcasm suddenly switched over to genuine delight. "Great! Actually, you're proof to the hard sells-- okay, we're going to head over to see a Russian ballerina and-- and are you sure I'm not a god? Because I think I'd make a good one. Like Hephestus. The one that makes the armor and stuff for the other gods."

Just a thought.

They would make it out of the hospital pretty easily. No one stopped them. Banner wasn't on duty. Thor was off being Thor and not hanging around. Loren would call when he woke up. Tony left a note with instructions to do just that, and not to overdo it if he felt better.

Because he knew Loren. And he didn't want to come back to another issue.

Steve smiled at the idea of Tony being the god that made all the armour, but he didn't explain why that would be such a fitting comparison. He wasn't about to start talking about the minutia of his world, it didn't seem like a good idea, it was better to keep these things separate.

"So, you know the other me, and-- Bucky?"

He couldn't help the small note of hope there.

This world, as far as they could tell, was completely mundane. Surely that meant no Winter Soldier, maybe Steve was actually getting to live out the life he always should have done with Bucky at his side. Unbroken, not hurt in ways that Steve could never heal no matter how much he wanted.

"Only met them twice. Once On Christmas and once the day after and oh. At the VA yesterday. They were there when I freaked out Sam Wilson." They were headed down the elevator and Tony couldn't help but gawk at the clearance Steve left getting through the door. He nearly had to suck it in and stoop. That was insane. Ten of the Steves that Tony knew couldn't do the same! "They live across the hall from the ballerina that's dating Loren's brother. She's the one that knows the Olympic athlete. Did you want to spy on what you'd be like if you were only a leg?"

They got off the elevator at the second garage level and Tony stopped in front of a souped up Harley. It wasn't his baby, that had been lost weeks ago, but she would do.

"Oh. Shit. You're huge. Do you ride? Because you'd be better off actually doing the driving. There are military check points but I have all the passes. We need to head to Brooklyn."

Steve would know where. It was where his old tenament used to be.

There wasn't a lot of point explaining that he knew what it was like to be small and skinny, not right now when apparently he was being taken to meet all of the others and would probably be asked questions that meant he had to explain all over again. Hopefully the other him wouldn't be too jealous, he doesn't think he would have been. Sure, he hated his body when he was younger sometimes, but he had never thought that a strong body would make him a better person, and it hadn't. Sometimes he worried that it had made him worse.

"Yeah, hop on behind, I can handle a motorcycle."

He straddled the seat, looking ridiculously like a wet dream pin up, and smiled a brilliant warm smile at Tony.

"Come on, I know exactly where we need to go. I used to live around there as a kid, and then I moved back a while ago. I'm Brooklyn born and bred."

"You're ridiculous." Tony was too flabbergasted to say anything else. "Jesus. Your Bucky must be happy, huh? Like every morning and before bed? Sometimes three times on the weekend?" He couldn't help himself. He wasn't coming into Steve, not even when he wrapped his arms around that muscular middle, because he always considered himself mostly straight until Loren came along, but he was human. And Loren showed him a thing or two when it came to two cocks in bed together.

He wondered, briefly, if Steve tasted like pizza and water ice when he came before they were off and heading down the heavily guarded singular entrance on and off the island.

It would take them an hour to get to Brooklyn, even with a bike, and twenty minutes to get close to the apartment building. They parked in the alley and then waited to be buzzed in.

Thankfully, the Steve that did the buzzing wasn't a jerk despite Tony crashing his session with Bucky's therapist. "Yeah. Yeah come up," he said through the intercom, weary and wanting to get back to bed with Bucky.

Steve couldn't help but feel guilt for the military checkpoints and the devastation they passed by; this was their fault, the rip through to this reality where they never should have had to deal with anything like the sorts of things that happened in their world. People were dead here, lives ruined, and he couldn't do anything to help them except make sure it never happened again.

It was weird to hear his own voice over the intercom, and he wondered briefly if he'd see Bucky. God, but his heart ached to see a happy and normal looking Bucky, even if he still loved Bucky as he was now. Not that he would get his wish, because Bucky was sleeping in the bedroom and didn't rouse when the buzzer went off, leaving Steve to greet his guests alone.

"Uh, hi," said Steve, smooth and not at all horribly awkward. "I'm-- well, you probably know who I am. I've come to help fix the rift. Do you mind if we come in, please?"

Steve's eyes lifted upward and he took a noticeable step back. "Chris Evans?" Wow, he looked really similar to him! He knew Bucky was a fan, he liked those Captain America movies, and he always said that Steve's eyes were even bluer than this guy's, but he wasn't sure anymore looking up at him. "Uh... Uh, yeah, absolutely..."

Tony glanced over his shoulder and laugh. "Huh. You do actually look like Chris Evans. More rom-com than Snow Piercer Chris Evans. So funny...but nah, Steve, this is you. The other you. From the world where Loren and Thor are gods."

That made Steve pale slightly. "Me?" That might have been a squeak. Or maybe a wheeze. Actually, yeah, it was a wheeze. It was cold outside, being January, and the long walks and car rides had a cough setting in.

Chris Evans? Steve had no idea who that was, but it wasn't really important and so he just waited until he was allowed into the apartment before stepping in and going to find a place to sit. Wow, this place was nice. Small, but homey, the sort of place that he might actually have liked to live in if SHIELD and Tony weren't so free with their money and insistent that he stay somewhere 'better'.

"I know this is going to be a lot to take in, and I'm really sorry. None of us were supposed to be actually coming through to your reality, but it turned out that Lok--Loren needed help, and I was chosen to come and bring that help."

He smiled, trying to put the other Steve at his ease.

"This is your place? It's great, real nice."

Though Steve didn't feel jealous exactly, he was still glad that Bucky was asleep. Their first conversation had more or less included Chris Evans as Captain America and Steve knew that he was Bucky's type of guy. They loved each other, they had each other's backs, but it was hard to think that Bucky wouldn't be attracted to this other version of him. He probably didn't need protection (probably? Steve, the guy's arms were the size of your waist!). He probably didn't need to be fretted over. And he was so tall-- He could probably satisfy Bucky in bed better too...

But that didn't make this other version of him any better in the long run. Still, it looked like he had no trouble breathing. That must be nice.

Steve ran a hand through his hair so that it laid perfectly across his skull and offered Tony a seat, which he took, before he shut the door and immediately went into guest mode. He plated some crackers and got everyone a bottle of water. "Thanks. Yeah, mom and I lived here...she left it to me. The neighborhood's getting steadily better but I own the apartment so that's been a really big help. Um...thanks for coming then. To help Loren. I heard he was in real bad shape."

Steve's smile flickered just a bit. He hadn't even thought of if Sarah might be alive in this reality, tuberculosis no longer being the killer that it had been in his time, but apparently life wasn't that kind. It hurt, it wasn't fair, she had been a good woman and deserved a longer and happier life. But at least Steve had Bucky to help him through, right?

His smile came back as he picked up a couple of crackers and began to nibble on them, always ready to help replenish what his ridiculously fast metabolism took away from him. The serum was amazing in some ways, but the amount he always had to eat each day was a little annoying.

"No, it's the least I could do-- we could do. I'm sorry that this now has to be awkward, I know it's weird to have to meet another version of yourself. I will be as unobtrusive as possible until the others arrive at the end of the week to help close the rip and then I'll be out of your hair."

His smile picked up at the corners, something so deep and fond in his eyes, unable to keep from asking any longer.

"So-- is Buck here? Uh-- Bucky, James Barnes."

Steve didn't exactly blush, though his cheeks and the tips of his ears did warm as he chuckled. "Yeah. Buck's here. He's just asleep." When he wasn't having nightmares, the other man could really sleep! Steve liked to think that was partially his fault, wearing him out like that. He clasped his hands between his knees and glanced to Tony briefly.

He had a lot of questions, though none of them really mattered. Learning about Steve's world wouldn't do them any good at the end of the week. He'd go back home, and they would stay here. Whatever knowledge he had wouldn't really help them.

He was also curious as to what was different about their worlds to allow Steve to bulk up like that, to be so tall. It was crazy. But he wasn't narcissistic enough to ask either.

So he focused, instead, on a topic that was vaguely in between. "You know Buck... And Tony and Nat where you're from?"

That look, that was a good look, it meant that Steve and Bucky had to be together in this world too. Not only that, but the fondness seemed to say that Bucky got to sleep without interruption, without nightmares, which just gave Steve all the more hope that this Bucky was like the old Bucky.

"Yeah," he grinned, though he tried to temper down what he would tell. "Nat and Tony are friends of mine, we work together, and Buck is-- Bucky is my husband." It still felt weird to say that, like he was still about to be grabbed by the cops and thrown in jail for liking perverse things, but it also felt amazing.

"I knew you'd know Bucky," he continued. "Doesn't matter what reality I've seen, me and Buck, we're always connected."

Steve was married to Bucky? That made the younger version grin stupidly, eyes bright, even as he laughed. "Well that's no pressure! We've only been dating for a few months." He did go looking for a wedding ring on Steve's finger and yes... There it was. Simple, gold. Just a band. That was definitely his style.

There was a moment of sadness, however, to realize that there was no left hand ring finger to wear a ring for Bucky. Maybe he wore his on his right?

He replaced the moment of meloncholy with a smile instead. They had awhile to discuss that. Hopefully. Besides, he felt vindicated to know that there were all sorts of Steves and Buckeys all over the place.

"How long have you been married?" Steve looked a good ten years older than him, maybe a little more. Had he and his Bucky rushed right into things? It probably didn't matter if they had a cosmic link. God must have wanted them to be together.

"Only two years now, it took a long time to get here, but he's worth the wait."

Steve was never embarrassed about being open with his feelings. No matter how many times Nat teased him, or Sam and Tony pretended to be sick, he was never going to tire of saying how much he loved Bucky. He had waited so many years, they had both been through so much, and he had recovered the man he loved from the depths of hell. To say he loved Bucky was a privilege, not something to be avoided.

He fiddled with the wedding band on his finger, he'd miss Bucky while he was here, but they were capable of being apart for a week.

"Trust me, Steve, few months or few decades, you'll never find another man like Bucky Barnes. He's one of the best."

"is it wrong to say that I feel like I've waited my entire life to meet him? And that it didn't matter if I did because as soon as we met-- I'm not sure about rate since God gave us our own free will, but if anything could possibly be fate-like, then being with him is-- Are you rolling your eyes at us, Tony?" He couldn't help but laugh. Evidently it was boring for anyone not named Steve Rogers to gush about the man they loved.

"Huh? Who me? Why would you say that? I love talking about love."

"You're engaged!" Steve grinned. "You're further along the whole love thing than I am." He just had to point that out.

Tony leaned back against his elbow and looked half over his shoulder at the older Rogers. "I don't think Loren and I are married where you're from, am I right, King Sized? He's evidently an alien in your world and I got the impression that he didn't like me much."

Loki was a mystery. Tony would hopefully never learn how much of an asshole his other self's best friend happened to be. Or about their bond.

Steve didn't think that was weird at all, and it was obvious by the way he had nodded along and smiled indulgently. Sure, he had met Bucky when he was a kid, but he had still felt like all his life up to that point had just been waiting without realising what he was waiting for. Bucky was an idiot who liked to tell people that Steve was the better man, but Steve knew that he'd be nothing without Buck, and there was nobody he admired more.

But then things got a bit more awkward with questions he wasn't sure he wanted to answer, hand rubbing into his hair uncomfortably.

"No, uh, right. You're not married, but you are really good friends and you're some sort of shield-guardian for his children in case he ever falls in battle. Something like that. But Loki doesn't like anyone very much, he's kind of... prickly."

"Whoa--" A voice from the bedroom doorway piped up, Bucky standing there in his boxers, a t-shirt, and no prosthetic. "What the hell is Chris Evans doing in our apartment, Steve? Are you shooting around here? Can I get an autograph?"

Though Tony did seem momentarily put out because he'd spent years trying to tack Loren down in a defined relationship and was about to open his mouth to ask if he was married at all (unlikely, in his opinion, since he had never wanted marriage before he met Loren), Bucky's reaction was comical enough to have the old man in stitches. He stood up, all hips, and clapped his hands. "Didn't Steve tell you that he and Chris go way back? They're like the Danny Devito and Arnold Schwartzenegger version of that movie Twins. Have a seat. I'll get paper for an autograph."

He was still chuckling as he passed Bucky, poking around in Steve's art studio because he figured they should have the assumption of privacy here. He was still going to listen and peek out but the idea of privacy was just as important as real privacy.

The younger Steve, who did not like to be equated to Danny Devito of all people, turned eyes nearly as blue as the Chris Evans doppleganger towards his boyfriend. "This isn't Chris Evans. He just looks a little bit like him." Or a lot like him. Damn. That other Bucky was so lucky. His had the defective one who was always sick. "This is uh... Me. Steve Rogers. From another reality beyond the rip in time and space-- I mean, you can still get an autograph if you want," he smiled.

Okay, Steve was really going to have to find out who this Chris Evans was, but that wasn't important right now because... where was Bucky's arm? That wasn't right, there was no Winter Soldier in this reality, he shouldn't still be hurt. But there he was, missing an arm, with deep blue eyes that still looked a little haunted even while he was smiling. It hurt his goddamn heart. That wasn't fair.

Bucky's eyebrows shot up and he looked Steve up and down for a moment as if assessing him, before holding out a hand to shake politely. "Good to meet you, weirdly huge alternate Steve." He grinned, the lopsided smile that the older Steve's Bucky had never quite got back properly. "This is so weird, I hope you know that?"

Letting his hand drop, he leaned over to kiss his own Steve softly, lightly, not caring that there were other people in the room. His voice lowered for his Steve's ears only, a soft purr. "Looks like I hit the jackpot with alternate yous, huh?"

It took a whole, whole lot of poise not to bristle at those words. It helped that he had been kissed – it still tickled him to have a person that looked like Bucky kiss him – but that purr in his voice-- It was horrible. He swallowed down his hurt as Bucky and the larger, bulkier, healthier, more charming version of him shook hands like fast fellows. “I guess it’s your lucky day. You always said you thought Chris Evans was hot. That one is off the market, though, so you’ll have to go poking into other realities.”

Steve tapped his own, bare, ring finger to get Bucky to look. And maybe not notice that the snark in his voice was a little out of character. Or that the words might not have been said entirely in jest.

He stood and went back into the kitchen to get Bucky something to drink. He’d never had reason to be jealous before, and he knew that Bucky was only teasing, but there was a little bit of guilt too. Bucky deserved better. The Steve in the living room probably could do a lot more for Bucky than he could.

He’d never had reason to doubt himself before and he was trying not to now either.

"What?"

Bucky had no idea what Steve was talking about for a few moments, but he could tell something was wrong even without the weird choice of words. It took a second for him to catch on, and then he was abandoning Tony and Steve in the lounge to dart for the kitchen and grab Steve around the waist one-armed.

"Idiot," he muttered, half amused and half annoyed. "I meant you, you big doofus. You're the jackpot, not him, I hit it lucky because I got you and not him. Jesus, you can be dense sometimes, you punk."

He didn't care hat the other Steve looked like. Sure, he found Chris Evans hot, but he wasn't in >i>love with Chris Evans. He was in love with Steve, his Steve, and that automatically made him the hottest and the best Steve.

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