fossilised | I come from a land of ice and snow

Loki looked more than a little hurt at his abrupt dismissal and the way he was so desperate not to be caught with her in his bed. Was he so cowardly that he feared what people might say to one who would sleep with a member of another species? She had not thought that of him, and she had already forgotten the foolish question of age for she was much older than he anyway.

She slipped out of bed and gave him a glare that told him how much trouble he was in, before turning into a bird and flying out of his window without a word.

Bruce, however, knocked again and started to turn the handle to come in. It's not like he was bothered by Tony asleep or even in a state of undress if he happened to be so, though the scent of sex certainly hit him right away when he poked his head inside and took in Tony with his tousled hair.

"Sleeping? Are you sure?"

Not even for a second did he consider who the partner might have been.

Having already told Bruce, brazenly, that he was capable of lying while looking someone in the eye, Tony arched an eyebrow and shrugged. "I did actually fall asleep." That was not the lie. "Obviously I'm not now. Do you mind..? Or are you here for measuring purposes?"

He wasn't fooling Bruce and he hated that he minded that. The guy could probably smell it on him.

So Tony pulled the covers a little closer to his waist and let his frown deepen. "Don't tell me that you suddenly regret saying no to me. Because I already said yes to my hand in your stead." Now that was the lie. But Tony really could only deal with one person pissed off at him at a time these days. "So five minutes. Let me shower and then we'll get dinner?"

It had been a long time since Bruce had even taken care of himself like that for fear of his heartrate rising too much to be safe, but even he knew that masturbation didn't make a whole room smell of sex like this. But it wasn't his business if Tony had managed to find one of the other men or women here to have a dalliance with, it wasn't as though he wasn't well known for it before Pepper.

So he held up his hands in a placating way and took a step back.

"Okay, okay. I'll leave you and your hand to shower, but hurry up because I'm hungry and I've been waiting for you for hours."

What ought to have been a good evening with Bruce ended up being terrible. Tony smiled and made jokes and laughed and ate just fine but his thoughts had split between paranoia of what Bruce might know and anger for having pissed Loki off. The girl shouldn't have been forced to leave, that was not indicative of a good time, but he still believed that he hadn't had a choice.

"So tomorrow for everything Jotnar?" he asked Bruce, over whatever sort of ground meat burger this was. Steve and Bucky and some of the others had already had a salted fish dinner with Helblindi but Tony didn't ask for details on that in case Loki herself came up in the conversation. "Or did Steve already start with the negotiations? Are we even negotiating? They're giving us a new home and maybe a little help saving everyone. What exactly do they expect us to ask for in return? Do we need a no-rape clause or something?"

He ate his burger a little more feircely, gnoshing away at it as if angry at the meat instead of himself.

"No, you're right, we're going to negotiate tomorrow. Both Steve and Prince Helblindi thought that everyone should be present, all council members and Princess Loki as well, since they both have negotiating powers."

Steve and Helblindi had actually got on very well, they both had the same sense of duty and moral upstanding ideals that let them see eye-to-eye very easily. Helblindi had also taken a shine to Bucky, just because he was obviously a strong and silent warrior who looked out for the ones he loved, he could respect that.

"Speaking of Princess Loki, what was the favour she wanted to ask you?"

Tony didn't really think that Bruce wouldn't remember and ask, did he?

"It was personal," Tony said, as if Bruce was suddenly the rudest person in the world for even asking. "I like her enough to want to be trustworthy. And all we need is an act of betrayal to ruin this deal we've got going. Sorry, Banner. You're just going to have to stay curious forever." But what could a seemingly teenage girl ask of an older man? Tony's mind immediately went to sex and he assumed that Bruce's did too. Shit. "Oh all right. You twisted my arm. She's engaged. Evidently you're supposed to give your hubby to be something nice on your wedding night."

And that didn't help get the topic away from sex! Fuck!

"I'm making him armor. Like mine. I'll probably make her a set too. Evidently my craft is better than the dwarves. I think that's a knock against my size. Frost giant joke. Ha. When's the thing tomorrow? I have a lot of work to do."

Oh god. Why was he suddenly acting like an idiot?!

Bruce's eyebrows just hiked higher and higher during this very odd interlude of Tony rambling nonsensically. He did ramble, often, but usually with a wit and a purpose that this didn't have, it seemed more like the rapid nervous speech of someone trying to cover something up.

Was it something to do with who he'd ended up having sex with? Someone Loki had introduced him to? Or maybe guilt that he had been slacking off having sex while he'd been commissioned to build armour to fit someone like Thor? That was more like it.

"Calm down, Tony, why are you so nervous?" He called it out pretty bluntly, it was good for Tony to have someone who could see through him and didn't put up with his bullshit.

"Why?! Because I'm having trouble with everything. It's one thing after another anymore. Another version of Loki owns another version of me but I really like her. She's smart and she's chaotic and i want to be friends with her. And it's not the first time! Another version of you dragged me down to a room full of women once a week and held me down and-- Ans you're my best friend, plus I'm not so secretly harboring feelings for you that I know you know I know you know about." Yep. Nervous and nonsensical ramblings were a go today. "And now we're moving. Again. I get all of my stuff set up and poof! Gotta go to a whole new world. Again. Cap and Buck are married like its some fairytale and I don't know where I'm going to find closure because I feel ashamed at how easily and quickly I'm just getting over everything. Like its so god damned simple. So let me have my issues. You're a help but banging it all out in metal is a bigger help. Hardware is cathartic. It can't always be some thought experiment."

He picked up his tray and just left Bruce there, staring after him. Tony really couldn't blame the guy. He'd just gone to crazy town on the what the fuck express with a first class accommodation.

He needed a moment. Alone.

Edited 2017-07-29 17:42 (UTC)

If Tony had stuck around then Bruce would have been able to tell him that there was nothing wrong with how fast or slow he was processing things, and what mattered was that he was doing better. He shouldn't feel guilty for that. But then he was gone and Bruce had no chance to say anything, he could only watch Tony go with a sigh that echoed around the little canteen area.

He debated going after him, but decided that perhaps Tony needed some space. Instead, he went to Helblindi and politely informed him that he was worried something may have happened between Princess Loki and Tony to set them at odds, it was the only thing he could think of. Tony only usually got that stressed out when he had fallen out with someone important to him.

He had no idea how close to the mark and yet far off he was.

After that, trusting Helblindi to deal with anything that might have come up, he went back to his own bed to sleep and wait for tomorrow's meeting.

Tony was going to kill Bruce. He just was. The man was dead. He couldn't die but Tony would find a way to make it happen. He was a genius. He could do anything. Why would the other man go and meddle? Why would he talk to Helblindi about it? There were a lot of questions but no good answers to that. Other than Bruce wanting to die.

That said, Helblindi went to seek his sister out. He was disturbed that she was making enemies, spreading her chaos, and while that was generally fine at home, their father was looking to them to make this a smooth vassalage.

"Loki?" His voice was like snow and ice, deep but soft.

Loki had gone to nurse her wounds by the nearest river she could find. She always liked the flow of water, it was chaos constrained by the boundaries of the banks, seemingly docile and yet capable of killing. She didn't understand why she had been snubbed so thoroughly by one she had begun to consider a friend, and so she had come here to sit and think.

Helblindi, however, would likely know her thoughts and her patterns and so would find her easily. She looked up at his approach and considered turning into an otter and swimming away to avoid this conversation.

"I have not become lost, you did not need to seek me out."

"Oh my dear sister, worried not was I about your location but about the friendship that had been obviously blossoming between yourself and the mortal dwarven smith. I had thought you two close and now I hear that there has been a falling out of friendship." Helblindi took a seat, slowly, on the much too warm ground. He had an affinity for water as well, it was kind of course to ice and snow, but he did not love it as Loki did. "Once, you would have told me all that worries you. Let us pretend that you are not in your majority, a woman grown, and can still speak to your brother."

He did care for her. Deeply. She was precious to them, yes. Magical and about to join their kingdom fully to Asgard. But they were also close in age enough that they had played as children together. He remember that fondly, until duty forced them to put away their toys and amusements.

"Perhaps I may assist."

Though Loki loved Bylestir, he had always been the baby and had not been as close a confidant as Helblindi, who had been her best friend as well as her brother. She could almost remember them being the same height, when they were both young, but those times had passed not too long after both had learned to walk. Now she could stand and barely reach his waist, but he still felt like the same Helblindi.

"You know that my marriage to Thor is fast approaching," she said, seeing no reason why she should not confide in her brother. "And you know how Aesir view those who have not seen any bed sport. I asked if Tony Stark would assist me by bedding me, for he is of a rough size with an Aesir. He did, but when it was done, he bade me leave in silence and haste when one of his companions arrived, ashamed of what he had done and fearful of being known for it."

This had just stirred up old insecurities long buried. "I know not if he felt shame for bedding one not a mortal, or if it was for my deformities, but shame was clearly felt."

He feared that Thor would feel that same shame. He was to be a King, the All-Father, might he not feel slighted that Jotunheim had sent him a runt for a bride?

"Hmmmm..." It seemed to take Helblindi quite a long time to get the sound out, though Jotnar were often slow of speech and moreso when left to thought. "I am unaware of what is typical in Midgardian culture when it comes to bed sport," he replied without judging. "I do not even know the practices of the Aesir nor Vanir," he confessed. Jotnar were often middle of the road sort, many mated for life. Their father was one. He wanted not sought any other after the death of their mother. And Helblindi had not yet had the chance himself to enjoy the body of another. He was not yet of age to worry about such. "You have been struggling with much, my sister. I did know realise how worried you were about this marriage. We have laughed many times of the way your prince will become wrapped around your finger just as we are."

He lifted a massive hand to set it as gently as he could on Loki's back before scooping her against his chest.

"It is wise to ask questions and to never assume. You will lost in chains of whys and what does with no answers and only paranoia and sorrow if you do. Mortals are emotional creatures. Perhaps they do not care to let others know of their bedded companions. Perhaps the one at his door was his chosen life mate and he had strayed. Perhaps it is against their culture to bed at particular times or would consider bedding a guest unseemly. Perhaps he desires more of you than he can have. Perhaps he is feeling none of those things and is simply have reactions to the way the Asgardians in the corrupted branches of Yggdrassil treated him. Did you not tell me of the forced breeding? Loki. Seek out your answers before you come again to the river to lick wounds you may not have. Your Tony Stark's friend was concerned for his behavior as well. It would be my conclusion that he has been caught in an emotion he does not care for. Perhaps he requires comfort?"

It was a lot to say and it took a long time to say it.

Helblindi felt exhausted.

Helblindi's advice was sound, but it did not fully soothe Loki's ruffled feathers, she had never shared something so intimate with another before and, even though it had been merely a favour to assist with her first night with her husband, she had not expected to be cast aside for any reason.

But perhaps there was another layer beneath this.

She could not know for sure unless she asked him, and yet it seemed so embarrassing to go to someone and baldly ask outright for the reasons for rejection. She leaned against Helblindi's chest and let her skin melt to blue in order to feel the comforting pulse of his cold and let him feel it in return.

"When did you grow so wise without my knowledge? I did not ask you to be this way, and tell me to offer comfort to one who has rejected me."

"Did he reject you outright, sister?" He wasn't being wise. He was just asking. Loki had thick skin, thicker than the rest. And as much as he wished to help her resolve this, he also needed to see it resolved himself so that their dealings with the Midgardians went well. His own future was at stake here. This was a test of their father.

Helblindi was not meant for the throne. He was not meant to be married off. He was the backup to their older brother and he was expected to do as much work as Bylister without half the rewards. That said, he had a duty here. He'd be matched to a favourable house and find love himself and be a good advisor.

That thought made his chest rumble.

"It is my duty to be wise. And my purpose. When you are of Asgard, I will be left to be wise alone. I must practice. Now come. Face your friend as a Laufeydottir. And tomorrow we shall add to our family's greatness by bringing these lost souls home."

"I may live on Asgard, Helblindi, but I will always be of Jotunheim. Thor will find he has married more than he can handle if he tries to keep me from my homeland, you will not be alone all that often."

She rose to her feet and kissed his shoulder, before turning to go back in search of Tony Stark. She would not be quite as understanding and patient as Helblindi wished her to be, but she would not wallow in misery either.

So it would be that not long after Tony had stalked away from Bruce at their ill-fated dinner, he would find himself once more accosted by Loki, green eyes flashing hard as flint and arms folded over her chest in a manner that from Midgard to Asgard meant that a woman was unimpressed.

"You must explain your actions, for they do not seem to me to be those of a friend."

Back to working on the armor, just in case Banner decided to follow him and make sure he was doing what he said he was, Tony was honestly startled to find the girl in front of him, being angry and demanding. For a moment, he didn't track what she was saying, he just sat back and turned off his multi tool before it turned a hole in him or anything else.

"Which actions?" Because for fuck's sake, if Loki was suddenly regretful of what they did, he might as well just come clean and let Steve figure out what sort of punishment he'd get. That would be the same as rape.

There was a reason statuatory laws existed. It didn't matter how old Loki was. She was still a child. And taking advantage of that had been wrong.

The fact that Tony did not even know which of his actions were so hurtful made Loki scowl even harder, green eyes like flint. She had thought him an intelligent man, he could not be so clueless as this.

"You threw me from your chambers in secret, as though we had done something to be ashamed of, as though I were someone to be ashamed of coupling with."

That was the heart of the issue, she feared being an object of shame. Not just with him, though that stung, but she feared it for her future. She did not want to be an embarrassment to the throne of Asgard, a reason to mock the future All-Father for his bride was defective, or even a reason that the relationship between Asgard and Jotunheim soured if they felt slighted by their choice in bride for their future King.

Tony arched an eyebrow at the girl. It was hard talking about this with a kid. When she had boobs and hips, he felt so much less like a dirty old man. Still dirty. Increasingly old. But less awful about himself. It didn't help that he wasn't ashamed of what they had done so much as being ashamed of nearly being caught. And of hurting her feelings.

"Do you remember the initial conversation where I told you that they would literally kill me if anyone found out?"

He watched her, warily.

"I'm not ashamed of you. But they can't know. It's wrong on a lot of levels. Which we discussed. Remember?"

"I thought that you were being hyperbolic, you could not possibly expect me to believe that age is an issue when I am many centuries older than you. And if it had truly been a deadly crime, I did not think you would risk your life just to have some bed sport."

She sat herself down, but at least unbent with her annoyance a little now that she could see that he was serious. What a fool, why had he endangered himself so just to do her a favour? He should have impressed on her what a bad idea it was, and she wouldn't have been offended.

"You made me think they may mock you for bedding me, and that your pride couldn't take it. It was Helblindi who made me see otherwise, so you should thank him for that."

"Mock-- yeah. No. More like throw me in a place where bad men that diddle little girls go. People are prudish. We don't have the long lives that you guys have." And he had tried to say no. He'd sort of tried to say no. Yeah. He knew this sounded badly. "I'm a jerk. I get that. But as much as you say you're a lot older than me, absolutely no one here will understand. And I hate to say this, but since I have no where else to go-- I can't let anyone find out so... Wait. Did you tell your brother?"

He almost dropped the tool he was holding.

Whatever he might have said that morning about other rounds, or more fun with Loki in all of her forms, he couldn't risk it. Not if she thought it was fine to tell everyone.

Shit.

"Helblindi already knew there was something amiss, he had been told by your Bruce Banner that we had quarrelled and he came to assist. I do not often lie to my brother, he is my closest confidant and I saw no reason not to tell him, he was not shocked or appalled at our decisions, only anxious that we should not remain at odds."

Loki rippled and became Jotnar in truth, all blue skin and delicate patterns, though she did not consciously make the choice to become so. She was agitated, and so she chose the form most soothing to her, most familiar.

"Your people should not be close-minded of the cultures of others. Perhaps if you had bedded a child of your species there would be wrong, but there is no wrong here, and your people should realise this."

Tony pressed his finger and thumb to the base of his nose. "You look like a kid. Not now. Well. You look like a Smurf kid. Or one of those Avatar people. I don't want to get into it. I helped you out. You helped me out. We had fun. And.. I'm sorry, Loki. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings or make you think I was afraid of being laughed at. I just want to keep being friends. I don't have a lot of them. And I have even less that I can talk to."

It was a big deal for him to apologize like this. Evidently Banner's efforts to shape him up had worked out. Tony felt like a better human being.

Minus sleeping with an alien princess. Ah god. Banner would judge him forever.

"I can't speak to what people feel. They just do. No one talks about who they sleep with but everyone loves to know who everyone else is sleeping with so that they can judge. And again. I'm sorry. Are we still friends?"

"What you are trying to say, without being so overt about it, is that you would like to be friends with me and not bed me again. But you do not wish to hurt my feelings and say so directly."

She at least believed him now, though the whole of Midgard had gone down in her estimation for being so backwards and narrow-minded as to fix only their worldview onto the cultures and worlds that were not their own. There were many strange things about the other realms on Yggdrasil, but she knew to accept them for what they were and not judge. It seemed Midgard had yet to learn that.

There was a brief hesitation as she considered making him suffer more, but she truly did enjoy his company and so she huffed with a nod.

"Of course we are still friends, foolish Tony Stark."

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