fossilised | Jotunheimr

Jotunheimr

Thor Odinson was not ready to be King.

That much had become suddenly and sharply clear to Odin All-Father, a sharp pain that he would rather not have had. He had been blinded too long by love for his only heir, seeing only his affable way of gaining friends and his strength on the battlefield, but ignoring how he had become spoiled and arrogant. He had glossed over the reports from Thor's tutors that his son had not studied the other realms or the duties of a King as he should, and had instead spent much of his youth carousing with his favoured companions, hunting or getting into trouble together.

But this... this was beyond a childish scrape.

Egged on by his friends, or so it had come out since the act, Thor had decided to go to Jotunheim - a forbidden act - for the sole purpose of finding one of its inhabitants and slaying it. A proof of his mettle as a warrior, to kill one of the fearsome giants, the monsters of the icy realm. He felt ashamed, sick at heart that his only son could be so ignorant as to think that any race were just monsters. He might have hoped these were just rantings, but he saw preparations begin to take place and he knew that they meant to commit treason by disobeying his orders of no contact with Jotunheim and perhaps start another war.

Arrangements were hastily made, pushed through Frigga who had more goodwill remaining to her among the Giants, and when Thor arrived at the Bifrost, he would find Odin standing by the great sword rather than Heimdall, his one eye forbidding.

"Why are you so eager to seek out war, my son?"

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Loki felt a little the sting of the reproof, even if Tony Stark was careful not to show any actual hurt. He had neglected his manners here, he had neglected to visit one that he did consider a companion, too focused on his task and the end goal that was tantalisingly in sight.

"We are friends, you have my apologies. It is only that I did not think you were one for the hunt, and I must slay this beast alone for it to have any meaning as a regard-gift."

He frowned around at the landscape as though it had personally offended him.

"I am hunting a mammoth, I wish to present its meat and furs to Thor Odinson. I feel the measure of such a regard-gift may be the push he needs to ask me to be his consort. Things have been growing closer between us, and I find myself impatient."

Scratching his head, Tony glanced over his shoulder at Bruce, who really had the most expressive face, and then returned his gaze back towards the taller, black haired man. “So I hate to break this to you, Princess, but Mammoths died out almost four thousand years ago. I know that’s not a long span of time to people that live a few million years or whatever, but you can’t hunt stuff that is dead. I mean, there’s elephants but they’re a protected species anyway.”

Tony scratched at his beard and turned to look at Bruce.

“Do you know if anything big and scary to give to the Prince of Asgard that might make him want to marry you? I mean, if you were in this position? He’s already got a pretty kick ass hammer and he doesn’t strike me as a jewelry sort of guy. What about some sort of shiny new car? To ride in. Not to get hit by. A new cape?”

To be truthful, Tony had no idea what you’re supposed to get for anyone you like that much. If he did, he’d understand why Pepper was perpetually disappointed when he told her to get herself anything she wanted for her birthday or Christmas.

“What about you propose to him? It’s the twenty-first century. You shouldn’t have to follow outdated tradition and wait for him to ask you.”

Well now, that was disappointing, but it did explain why Loki hadn't managed to pick up the trail of one for the whole time he had been hunting. He had thought that this would prove to be one of the larger and more deadly animals Midgard had to offer, anything more paltry would be far less impressive as a gift.

"Because he is to be the All-Father of Asgard, I do not have the right."

That wasn't technically true. He could do whatever he wanted, there were no laws saying that he couldn't be the one to request they be bound together, but it would be seen as suspicious. He needed the impetus to come from Thor, to silence the whispering tongues that might say it was a Jotnar scheme. As he concentrated, he shifted into the form of a woman, the change of which caused Bruce to make a small aborted gasp in the back of his throat.

"--ah yes," the sound had drawn Loki's attention. "And you bring protection when you come to me this time, why is that? Do you feel you need a leashed beast to speak with a companion?"

"I-- what?" Bruce looked aghast, taking a step back. "I'm not--"

Tony opened, then shut his mouth before he actually laughed. “Banner? He’s not leashed. He’s just perpetually chill,” Tony said, completely without any attempt to hide anything. “You’re really full of parlor tricks. You’re not some supervillain, Loki.” Tony slipped his hands into his pockets, arms left loose and open. “And Banner’s not hired help. He’s a friend. We’re working through some temporal problem-- Which I actually thought you’d know about, considering the whole Infinity Gem or Stone or Amulet whatever things.”

But if Loki hadn’t somehow shifted time back a few thousand years to hunt a mammoth, he wasn’t responsible for Bruce mailing himself a letter from the future.

Technically, this would be the point where Tony would introduce the pair, but Tony wasn’t really all that great in social situations. He could charm the pants off of almost anyone but one on one, he was useless.

“Guess this puts us both back at square one. Damn. Oh, hey. Don’t you have something super scary on Jotunheim you can kill? Wouldn’t that make it more personal anyway?” Tony had turned, as if to walk back to the quinjet. He just assumed Banner and Loki would head back with him.

"Of course not, Midgard was-- ah, of course, you wouldn't know. The All-Father, to assist in preparing his son for a rule better than his own, has named Thor as Protectorate of Midgard. This realm belongs to him, and so a gift from here would be the most appropriate."

Loki either did not know or did not care to know that the idea of Midgard being owned by another realm might be considered insensitive. It was truth, that was all, just as Jotunheim may have to submit eventually to Asgard's overall rule. That was how the Norns had designed the Nine, that was how they should function.

"He does not know I am here, and I do not have more than a few weeks before he will begin to wonder why I have not returned from touring the forges of Alfheim. Though he was a fool to think I would ever go there, what Jotnar would submit themselves to heat of the forges?"

“Woah, let’s walk it back there,” Tony said as they headed for the quinjet. Poor Bruce, he was left to follow along and try to pick up parts of the conversation. He’d been the most interesting thing when they were alone but Tony, obviously, had Loki on the brain at the moment and was allowing poor Bruce a little time to recoup from the intense scrutiny one must endure when one was the object of Tony’s interest. “Did you say Thor is our protector? Because I’ve got that. Rogers and I are good to go. Plus, he’s never here so… Yeah. Whatever you guys want to decide is fine but maybe keep that under your hat. Just about no one would like that. Plus no one’s even heard of Thor.”

Some protector!

He did swivel out a chair for Loki, though, because chivalry wasn’t dead and he did know how to handle matters of royalty. “A few weeks touring a forge sounds interesting. You should take me sometime,” he remarked and plopped himself down in the turned around chair at the cockpit. It was only then that he noticed Bruce again and grinned brightly up at him. “But for right now, we have an issue maybe you can help with while we brainstorm how to make Thor marry you. This guy sent himself a letter from the future. Any idea how that might be possible?”

It did not matter if the mortals hadn't heard of Thor, or if Tony wanted to take that mantle for himself, these were not up for debate or choice. The All-Father had decided, and Asgard once again traded another realm as though it were mere property. A part of Loki burned with hatred for them all, despite the complex feelings he had for Thor himself, and this was something he wished to change.

But not now, not yet, perhaps not ever. First on his priority list would always be his own people and himself, Jotunheim must prosper, everything else was secondary. If he had to watch Midgard be subjugated to achieve it, he wouldn't even hesitate.

"The future?" Consider his interest piqued. Slender fingers spread as if silently asking to see the letter, glancing back up at the man who contained a beast no matter what protests he might make. "Not impossible, but more likely another reality. Another him elsewhere in the cosmos."

“How is alternate dimensions more realistic than time travel?” Inquiring genius minds really needed to know. Poor Bruce looked a little lost, probably because he’d just made the distinctly difficult journey to get to Stark, been dragged out to Africa, was talking to a God who could shapeshift and currently playing second fiddle to the billionaire and his enamored conversation with a currently female Loki discussing science fiction of all things.

And Tony was entirely too busy chatting with Loki to really pay attention to the deer in headlights, confusion laced stares he was getting from Bruce.

“I guess we could put a pin in that. Let’s say that there’s another Banner in another dimension telling this Banner in this dimension to find me, does that mean that the Banner in that dimension is friends with the other version of me? And how, if we’ve never met? Could dimensions be that divergent?”

"I believe so."

Loki was also too focused on Stark to pay any attention to Banner. He had registered the leashed beast as a potential threat, and he would keep him in the corner of his vision just in case the monster within decided to make an appearance, but otherwise all of his interest centred on his friend.

"Different dimensions are not my specialist branch of magic, Jotnar fyri are designed in different ways, that magic is usually known to the Vanir. But now that I have free reign to travel, I could go to Vanaheim and speak with their seidr users to see what I can learn."

Tony’s nod was distracted. “Probably a good idea. I don’t know how often people reach across dimensions to say hello to each other but that can’t be good for time and space as a whole. You poke fabric enough and the dimple stays.”

He turned just enough to put the craft in the air. Technically, Loki could zap them all around but he preferred to fly. And Banner might not be able to stay so chill if his whole body was reduced to fractals and sent along a path to destruction only to be reconfigured again after existing what Loki called the Void.

“I’m a little jealous that other versions of me know about it before I do though,” he said with an offhanded shrug, though the jealousy in his voice was very real. “I wonder what the trouble is though. If the world gets ripped apart as a byproduct of interdinensional post cards... Banner, that’s pretty selfish of the other you.” Just saying.

Loki would have preferred to travel by the more expedient method, he didn't quite understand why the mortals insisted on using their crafts when it added so much time. A tiny amount of time for him, but for a species so short lived as humans, he would have thought that efficiency would be everything.

"There will be much that other versions of you know that you do not, and much that you know that they do not. Some will be so close as to seem indistinguishable, the changes as small as the choice of clothing, and some will be worlds apart from anything you have known."

He would be fascinated to explore it himself, though he was slightly more wary of the risks.

"I would assume that this message came from one not too different from our own, or else such a warning would likely be pointless."

“But then why be vague?” Tony would have done so much better if Bruce penned himself a letter that made sense. As much as he liked puzzles, and he really did like them, this was borderline crazy. “Why not just spell out exactly what I’m supposed to do?”

Tony’s eyes turned towards Bruce as if he could come up with the answer on his own. The guy was as confused as he was, but he’d made the journey here instead of dismissing the warning out of hand. Dark eyes searched Bruce’s face as if he was looking for confiscared drugs, vission narrowed in a squint. It was all together uncomfortable.

Bruce was a hider. He was a runner. He wasn’t good at being a bug under glass. The voice in the back of his head told him that, but Tony listened to no one. Not even himself.

"Perhaps he was unable to, though for what reason I do not know."

Loki also turned her eyes to Bruce, sharp and green and penetrating, making the smaller man shift uncomfortably from foot to foot. He did want the help of the people here, and meeting an actual god or alien was amazing, but this was really not good for his stress levels.

"Reminder," he said, voice still light and easy. "This isn't actually me, I'm the one as confused as you. I'd appreciate if you could ask on, uh, Vanaheim, though. Is that somewhere we could come with you?"

Loki raised an eyebrow at the tamed monster. "Midgardians do not have free travel rights across the realms yet, to take you to Vanaheim would be unwise."

“So... do we need some intergalactic passports? Background checks? You can’t say that your fiancé is going to protect the world and then not let us visit alien planets. That’s cruel.” Tony wasn’t going to let this go. Not after Banner mentioned it. “And aren’t I your Guide? Doesn’t that mean something?”

Tony could pout and be petulant like the best of them. And often was.

He put the flight plan in, set JARVIS up for autopilot and turned around so that he could give Loki his best impression of his mother. The woman could guilt him in a second. It was a true skill.

Loki was not so easily guilted, he had long ago perfected the art of lying to even those who were the closest to him and not feeling even a twinge of regret. He did what he needed to in order to further his goals, and taking mortals to Vanaheim would likely not do that.

"It means that you guide me in matters relating to Midgard and its culture, you would be useless as a guide on Vanaheim. I will not risk the wrath of the All-Father for such a thing, it would be folly."

Bruce nodded, regret in his eyes even as he backed up Loki. "He... She's right. I don't think me going to a whole other world is a good idea, it sounds kind of stressful."

“Neither of you are any fun.” And now Tony was going to have to devise a way to spy on the things Loki does to try and figure out a way to do it himself. He could so easily set up a series of scans to test for all sorts of data. Plus, he already had the equipment in place already for it. When Loki decided to pop out of existence again, he’d see what changes to the atmosphere happened, if any laws of physics were broken and what particles were emitted. It could take him years to replicate but that was a pretty good way to spend them.

Maybe Banner would even stick around and help? It might be fun to have another smart guy to bounce ideas off of.

Tony leaned back against the panel, elbow perilously close to the joystick. He wasn’t going to crash them, of course, but he was also careless.

“Could you let us know what you find out? If some version of Banner went to a lot of trouble to do this, it’s gotta be pretty big”

"Naturally, I would not offer to go to Vanaheim if my intention was not to discover more about your plight and return to you with that information."

But now that this involves magic and other dimensions, Loki definitely wants to be at the front and centre of it. He probably could risk taking at least one of the mortals with him, because this concerned him and his life, but he wants to be the one holding all the cards.

"I may have time to stop at the Free Markets while I await an audience with the seidr users, is there anything you wish for me to buy?"

Hopefully Tony wouldn't come up with something too outlandish.

Carte blanch was a very dangerous thing to give to Tony. Eyes as wide as saucers, he couldn’t help but grin at Loki as if he was moments from catching the canary out of its cage. “You know what I’d like? Something I can tinker with. A piece of metal not found on Earth, some piece of technology-- Your choice.” See? He wasn’t too crazy, right? Even if giving an inventor like Tony a piece of alien technology was Not A Good Idea.

Not at all.

“Not some child’s toy either, just because you’d think I’d be amusing to watch play with. We might not live as long as you, but I’m still smarter than your fifth graders.”

Potentially.

Of all the wonders in the universe, Tony Stark chose to ask for something technological. It was endearing and it made him think, once again, how akin to the dwarves that mortals were. They valued progress and the intricacy of the designs they made over all else, the pursuit of wealth was a large factor in their society, perhaps it would be well to introduce the two cultures when more solid agreements had been put in place.

"Your idea of intelligence is limited, my friend, but I shall bring you what you desire as well as the answers you seek, if such answers can be found on Vanaheim."

He reached out and lightly brushed Tony's forearm with his fingertips, a gesture of affection.

"While I am gone, your tame beast and you can find a creature worth hunting and presenting to Thor."

The idea of Bruce being his tamed beast should not be so amusing, but Tony couldn’t help but not, an odd little smile on his lips. “You’ve got it.” He was expecting the princess to pop out of existance right in front of him, and wo while Bruce had his little outburst of surprise, Tony just turned back to the control panel as if everything was normal and good.

Trying to find some sort of creature for Loki to bag for her future husband, though, was going to take some time. He could always clone a mammoth-- But regulatory boards were getting harder and harder to bypass these days.

Better not risk it.

He hadn’t forgotten that Bruce was there, exactly, but his mind had moved onto other things. Banner could have his little what even is my life moment and that could be that for now. They’d reconvene in a moment.

“Blue whales are a proected species, aren’t they?” Tony mused.

“They are, sir,” JARVIS responded. “Do not suggest that Princess Loki hunt a whale, please. The red tape would give Ms. Potts endless headaches.”

“And we don’t want that…” Tony murmured, as if he wasn’t so sure.

A tiny part of Bruce couldn't help but wonder if he had somehow hit his head and this was all one long fever dream brought on by the resulting traumatic wound. Aliens, gods, and teleporting... not to mention other realities and a man who seemed like he didn't think any of this was weird.

"No."

He looked up, surprised at even his own voice, apparently joining in the conversation before his brain even caught up to what he had been listening to.

"Hunting animals for sport isn't right, and we shouldn't be encouraging anyone, even a foreign ruler, to engage in that sort of thing here. We can look for other types of gifts, more traditional and less destructive types."

“Excuse you and your white privilege,” Tony said, though he knew he was misusing the term here. He mostly just wanted to feel the other man’s annoyed disapproval. That excited him. Banner was a little like Rhodey and a little like Pepper. He would follow along, but still keep his own mind and be willing to stick his hand in the fire to pull Tony back from it.

It wasn’t often that Tony made friends, but when he did, he latched on. He really needed to latch onto Bruce too. The guy was literally famous for disappearing.

“Technically, Loki doesn’t want already dead things. But I’ve got a feeling that Asgard and the Vikings are pretty similar. Didn’t they use to make a lot of crap out of bones and tusks? I’ll buy some dinosaurs. JARVIS, see what we can offer the National History Museum for the T-Rex.”

"Sir, it's usually illegal to procure artifacts of that type of historical significance, and I doubt they would be for sale even if it weren't."

That was JARVIS, subtly siding with Dr. Banner. As an AI he wasn't supposed to have emotions or independent thought, that was technically impossible, but it didn't stop it from happening. Perhaps it was just sophisticated programming, but JARVIS liked Dr. Banner already and had a feeling he might be a steadying influence on an otherwise incredibly unsteady master.

Bruce nodded along, twisting his hands into knots on his lap, working on deep breathing to keep this situation from getting the better of him.

"I was thinking more like a rare book, or a piece of art, something not so illegal or bloodthirsty."

“A piece of art. For Thor.” Now it was Tony’s turn to laugh because the idea of Thor and a book was laughable. “Think hammer, think luxurious hair, think marauding and raiding villages. Don’t think of yourself.” Note that Tony did not put himself in that boat either. Books were fine. Very good as arm rests or to keep a hot plate from your crotch if eating on the couch.

He really wanted to do Loki a solid here. He liked the princess, she was an amusingly colorful part of his existence lately and though Tony would never consider himself a collector of anything, the guy had anything he wanted.

It made the rest of life a little boring.

Hence blue princesses and sometimes green scientists were in his expanded social circles.

"Well you can't just go about hunting animals for sport."

Bruce might turn into a big green killer sometimes, but he was passionately opposed to that sort of thing usually. Perhaps more so than he would have been otherwise, almost like a desperate need to make up for his violent nature however he could.

"What about a piece of tanned hide? People who kill and butcher animals for the meat trade sometimes keep the hides and have them tanned."

That, at least, would be more ethical.

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